Practical & Aesthetic Reasons to Grow a Moustache
Grow a Moustache
Just a decade or so ago, a beard and moustache combination would be the preserve of heavy-metal musicians, live-action role-players and actors in period dramas. Nowadays, however, the tables have utterly turned – and facial furniture is more popular than ever. Is this just a passing fad, or are beards and moustaches here to stay? And what are the reasons behind this dramatic conversion of the mainstream? The reasons are practical as well as aesthetic. Besides helping the modern gentleman to look and feel fantastic, moustaches also serve several important functions. Let’s take a look at some of them!
A 2011 study into the links between skin cancer and moustache-wearing drew considerable press attention when it was first released (as indeed does most research with even the vaguest mention of what might cause or prevent cancer). As ever, the first casualty of this publicity was the truth of the contents of the study itself, which concluded that ‘protection from UVR (ultraviolet radiation) is provided by the facial hair; however, it is not very high…’ This conclusion would make sense – which a moustache will protect your skin against harmful rays, it covers such a small area of the face that its benefits would be negligible. Grow a beard that covers your entire neck and chest area, on the other hand, and those benefits would be more substantial. Longer facial hair equals reduced exposure to sunlight. A far more effective weapon in the battle against cancer deals not with skin cancer, but with prostate cancer. The charitable drive of Movember has been rumbling along steadily for several years now, and shows no sign of slowing. By growing a moustache for a month out of the year, participants can raise money for prostate cancer research. Of course, since moustaches are now more fashionable, the price men pay for growing one has shrunk considerably – and so this often ends up more as an excuse than a reason.
It’s a well-documented fact that men with moustaches are considered more trustworthy. That’s why they consistently appear in advertisements. Of course, there are some limits to the power of the moustache – they’re avoided by politicians, presumably out of a desire to avoid aping the 20th century’s most divisive figures. If your beard is medium-length and well-kempt, however, then you can expect those who you interact with to find you easier to trust.
People with moustaches are undoubtedly more attractive than those without. At first, it might not be entirely clear why this should be. But once you realise that the moustache helps to even out any subtle facial asymmetry, it begins to make sense. We human beings have adapted to consider facial symmetry one of the primary aesthetic criteria through which we judge one another’s suitability for mating. Or, to put it another way, if your face is wonky, then you’re probably uglier than if it’s nicely lined up. A moustache is a great way of covering this up.
On a related note, facial hair will also reliably induce strangers into talking to you. Moreover, they won’t be talking to you about something mundane like the weather or the possibility of a trade agreement between New Zealand and a post-Brexit Britain; they’ll be talking to you about your appearance, and probably in a complimentary way. Which, let’s face it, is something most men will welcome.
Growing a moustache means that you don’t have to spend as much of your time shaving. Depending on how much you value your time, this might amount to a considerable expense over the course of a year or more. Also, growing a beard or moustache will eliminate the need to go through disposable razors every day, thereby lessening the strain on one’s finances. Of course, we should note here that there’s a difference between growing a moustache and growing a high-quality moustache. In order to keep the latter under control, you’ll want a steady supply of moustache waxes and oils, and a high-quality pair of moustache scissors for trimming.